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What To Do When Someone Uses The R-word

January 7, 2023

As the pandemic has eased, I have spent more time with people close to me and in ordinary community places.

And it has been alarming to me how many people are still using the R-Word!

It’s angered me and, at first, paralyzed me, leaving me unsure of how to respond.

But now, I am prepared, and I know precisely will instantly say.

I’m sure you’ve had similar experiences with people about you using the R-word… I created a short video to show you precisely what to do in these situations.

Click the video below to learn how to handle R-word situations.

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  • Words like ”retard”, ”imbecile”, ”idiot”, etc are relics of the 19th and early 20th century dark age of psychiatry during which even those who were slightly neurodivergent often ended up forcibly immured in asylums where they usually experienced treatment bordering on medieval torture. Those words used to be medical terms for labelling those considered ”defective” on neurological grounds.

    • Not to mention, terms like those were also popular with proponents of the eugenics movements of the 19th and early 20th centuries. Eugenics sought to weed out people considered by the ruling elites as “inferior”, including black people, Hispanics, religious minorities, the physically handicapped, the mentally ill, neurologically disabled, those with any deformities, etc. It’s essentially the philosophy that helped lead to the Holocaust.

  • Great advocacy tip. I think alot of older people use that term. And it will get better, the terms before were super bad.

  • Great discussion. About time this is raised. It is so totally out of date and out of place these days. I wish i had had “Use Another Word !” in my head ready for when my own husband came out with the r word in front of noth of our kids… so ridiculous that we still need these 3 words today but unfortunately so true.

  • Great suggestion! Thank you. When people have used it around me and my son I’ve stayed silent and that’s not the right thing to do. I love this strategy and will definitely use it.

  • Excellent overview of how this devaluing and offensive term hurts relationships. Loved the clear, yet non-confrontational approach of “Use another word.” The person can then choose to ask why or ignore. Either way you stood by your values.

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